Full House
by Rads
Summary: Thought i'd have fun with the whole 'Return of Daniel' thing. Enjoy! and yes Jonas is vaguely there. plz review, no hot flames...little simmers maybe allowed. Ratin for cussin, and a mention of nudity (just to be safe) Chap 2!!!
1. The first Chapter

Disclaimer: I do **not **own SG-1, i do not own the/a stargate or in anyway are assocated with the creators of Stargate / Stargate SG-1. **I own nothing.**  
  
  
  
CHAPTER ONE: Puzzled Planet  
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The planet was silent, at least from outer space. A nice ball with green and blue splurges of earth and water visible from the vastness of space. Closer inspection showed trees, it matched so many other floating spheres in the blackness but something about this one was slightly different, slightly new. It held a small secret that was valuable to only one other planet. The other planet was called Earth._  
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Linked together by wormholes was a vast interstellar network- the modem was usually a DHD or a dial home device. The phone line was a wormhole and the monitor was whatever the travelers saw at the other side. The ancient marvel was called a Stargate.  
  
Earth had its own Stargate (SG) Command, built inside a mountain that was maintained by the best that the dominant species could provide.   
  
SG-1 was like the flagship, the pioneers, the best of the best of all the SG teams and they were one man down.   
  
The team of humans currently consisted of one Colonel Jack O'Neil, Captain Samantha Carter, a Jaffa from Chulak- Teal'C and another alien banished from his home world- Jonas Quinn.   
  
They were a team dedicated and loyal to the cause of exploration and in making diplomatic relations with other species/races.   
  
And as Jack would say- they had guts. As the commanding officer he'd do anything for his 'kids' ie. His team.   
  
  
  
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They stood at the 'Gate with large packs indicating that this was going to be a recon mission in theory.  
  
Sam ran through in an easy jog, entering the Gate Room, and joined the remainder of the team that had, for some reason, arrived earlier. She was a touch suspicious about her teammates eagerness for this boring and unusually routine mission.  
  
Running a hand through her short blond hair she gave an uneasy smile towards her commanding officer who helped explain why he was here early with a,  
  
" I here that there's fish on this planet" he rocked back and forward on his feet and wagged his eyesbrows. She looked over his back and saw that Teal'C was carrying four fishing rods. Jonas was at the edge of the ramp with a lolly-pop, the guy was still determined to try all of earths food.  
  
"And General Hammond agreed to this recreational side-line?" she was not going fishing.  
  
"In a way" Jack vaguely answered and dismissed any further questions by turning to Jonas (who was now wondering how to eat an orange), "You ever tried curry?"  
  
Sam had her back facing them as Jack left her side.  
  
She smirked and found the Colonels humor a little too cute sometimes. Shaking her head she looked to her watch and then up to the control room, they were just about to start the dial up sequence- punctual as usual.  
  
The preliminary reports from this planet stated that it was virtually the same as Earth except for the slightly larger mountains, larger trees, larger everything - apart from a few forms of wildlife.   
  
Sam wondered how large the 'fish' were- though she had been relieved to find out that there weren't any bugs on the planet. The planet was designated P3X22222 or something along those lines- Sam would only put its designation to memory if it turned out to have a special resource or a civilization on it.  
  
  
"What's this one called?" she turned around to face the others who were looking very impatient, even Teal'C was looking up at the control room as if waiting for them to say 'go' to start the race.  
  
"Hm" Jack was the first to give some response. Ever since Daniel had 'ascended' Jack had started naming the planets. It was something to do with how Daniel had never liked just giving a planet its own code, he preferred having a name to remember- not just individual letters scattered with numbers and so Jack had taken up this stance as well.   
  
Jack racked his brain for a word that stuck out but he'd used all of his 'good' ones up. There were now planets 'out there' known as Bob, Big One, Small One, Sand, Dirt, Hell, Cold, Garbage, Fishless, Fred, Vulcan as well as Disneyland etc.   
  
"Can I name this one?" Jonas timidly asked.  
  
"Sure" Jack breezed with flippancy.  
  
"Curry" Jonas gave out his suggestion.   
  
"Planet Curry?" Teal'C put on his loaded backpack and joined the conversation.  
  
"I like it" Sam grinned at Jack whom was now making a show of mulling it over. Jonus was waiting with an almost worried expression on his face, waiting for approval on so many levels. The grip on his orange forgotten.  
  
"Why that name?" Jack had decided to mess around and Sam decided to look as uninterested as possible and started a conversation with Teal'C about the non- possibility of there being Gould on this planet.  
  
" Because I've never tried curry and I've never been to this planet- new things" Jonus repeated a matter of factly.  
  
  
" Curry it is" Jack smirked and Jonus tried not to sigh with relief.  
  
"Dial-up sequence engaged" the eagerly awaited words filled the almost empty gate room.  
  
"Finally" Jonus commented and received.  
  
  
**_The local residents of the planet Flint were cautious of outsiders, especially those who land naked on their doorstep._**  
  
  
A little orange rolled on the floor and the flagship team of the SGC departed to planet Curry, aka. Flint.  
  
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Rads: I thought that i'd join in!! I felt i needed some fun in this little neck of the fanfiction.net woods.  
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Please Review**


	2. Oh yes Another chapter!

Disclaimer: I do **not** own SG-1, Stargate- nothing!  
  
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CHAPTER TWO: TAZ AKA. FLAKY  
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He sat perched on a rock, staring at nothing and seeing the world in a blurred form. He squeezed his eyes shut wishing that this permanent headache would just cut him some slack. He didn't know who he was and he was confused.   
  
The blurred circle stood below from his vantage spot and he felt its familiarity tease his mind. He'd come he everyday since his ungraceful awakening. Naked on the ground, sore all over and being observed by far too many people seemed to have spooked him. It was like one of those nightmares you have about leaving your house naked and everybody laughing.   
  
Still the villagers had taken him in, given him clothes, some (bad) food and a nice little hut on the outskirts. He found that he possessed a honed ability at picking up their strange sounding language- they hadn't had a clue about the one he'd possessed.   
  
He felt most comfortable with his original language (English). It wasn't like he hadn't tried; he used his familiar language (the villagers didn't have a clue) and then stumbled through a few others that his frazzled brain apparently possessed.   
  
The villagers still frowned at him with hostility so instead-he started listening to them. Hearing their words and mixing a few of the comprehensions he possessed and finally their language made sense- vague sense.  
  
He touched his face, wondering if he was missing something and wishing that he knew his name. The villagers had called him Taz but it felt stupid somehow and it also meant 'flaky' in their language. He didn't appreciate it; in fact it made him a little unreasonably angry.  
  
With a sign he tried to focus on the stone circle below, the villagers had called it 'door' although 'Taz' didn't know why. They'd told him about the 'Gods' and he'd been confused at his sudden urge to laugh. Hence the hut he was now 'banished' too, apparently smirking at the name Yu was the wrong thing to do.  
  
He got up, walking towards the Door. His blue eyes were still trying to focus, the wind brushing his short blond hair and his clothes feeling itchy.   
  
Then it seemed to happen, lights and familiar noise as bits of the Door started to move and, for lack of better words, lock-in. He took a step back, stumbling and falling clumsily to the ground. A curse followed 'shit'.  
  
He blinked and there were no lights, just the Door standing as normal. He felt stupid; maybe he did deserve the name 'Taz'.  
  
Then it really started and he whispered 'Incoming traveler?'  
  
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Rads (Me);: I know this is probably mince but come on! you want to review! feel free to give suggestions.  
  



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